To the girl sitting on the ledge,
I know what you’re thinking. I know what you’re planning. It breaks my heart that you’re going through all this right now. It’s not fair and I wish I could take all the hurt away. But I can’t. Here’s some things I wish you would know.
- It’s okay to go back home.
I know right now you feel like there’s no place for you to go. Like no one wants you and you’re all on your own. No one said you had to stay in the city, hours away from your family. No one banished you from that side of the province. You’re allowed to go back home.
- It’s okay to ask for help.
I know you want to go home, but you won’t because everyone told you that you wouldn’t make it on your own. Everyone said you weren’t ready. And now they’re right. Except, they’re not. You’re so strong. You’re a fighter. Don’t give up now. Asking for help doesn’t mean you’ve lost the fight. It means you’re strong enough to know what it takes to win.
- It’s okay to ask for forgiveness.
I know right now all you want to do is call your dad and ask him to come get you. I also know that you don’t think he’d come. But let me tell you that keeping your pride is not worth throwing it all away. It’s okay to call and say sorry. He loves you. He’ll be there.
- It’s okay to forgive yourself.
There’s so much hurt in your life right now and I know you feel like it is all your fault. But what if I told you that in just 48 hours, a doctor is going to get down on her knees to get to eye level, stare you in the eyes and tell you “It is NOT your fault.” You don’t have to beat yourself up anymore.
- Quitting doesn’t make you a failure.
You’re feeling like you need a break. The thought of school is too overwhelming right now. I get it. Putting your life on pause for a few months to find the help you oh-so-desperately need is allowed. Quitting school doesn’t make you a failure. You don’t have to be done forever, just postpone it until the next semester.
- Boundaries are a good thing.
There’s a ton of people in your life right now that are taking advantage of you. You feel like you can never please them all. Let me tell you a secret. You can’t. So let them go. Some won’t be a part of your life anymore and that’s okay, you don’t need them. Some will only have small access to your life and that’s okay too. You don’t owe them anything. Protecting yourself is the number one most important job you have in your journey of self-care. Boundaries are a huge part of that.
- Don’t give up.
Giving up seems like the only option right now. I know it’s hard. I know you don’t feel like fighting anymore. But please, put the bottle down. Call someone and ask for help. Whatever you do… Don’t give up.
Love,
Yourself… Two years later.
Nichole is a Social Media Marketing Manager, student, daughter and friend. She has a Marketing Diploma and a Certificate of Christian Theology. She is an avid coffee lover who enjoys a good movie or book. She takes great joy in organizing, scheduling, and volunteering. Her passion for volunteerism extends specifically to those who are hurting, whether it is emotionally, physically, or mentally.
Nichole is certified to provide Mental Health First Aid, which means she can provide immediate support and guidance in a safe environment, comfortably have a conversation about mental health related issues and offer professional and other supports. This does NOT make Nichole a psychologist, or a counselor. It simply gives her the tools to direct people to the help they need.
You can follow Nichole on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Google+, Pinterest, Linkedin and her Personal Blog.
Defying Shadows 
Beautiful.