“I’m not okay.” [Being a business owner shouldn’t change that.]

It’s 7:50pm on a Saturday night. I have 18 tasks on my to-do list for today and seven are overdue.

Four of those have been overdue for over a week.

I’m overwhelmed.

There’s so much to do.

I’m a business owner. I love my job. I love my company. I love it all.

But I’m stressed, tired and fighting a serious panic attack.

Sure – stress, anxiety, etc. comes with the job title.

But how many business owners fight through their mental illness, keeping face while pushing through?

It’s been a few weeks of severe anxiety and depression seeping into my life and it leaves me feeling….

Alone.

Which is sad… because it doesn’t have to.

Why don’t we talk more about these things? Why don’t we share with our peers what’s happening?

What if we talked about these issues? What if it was acceptable to look at your business partner and say – I’m suicidal. I can’t do this right now.

If we talked about these issues and were open about how we were really doing, would we be able to prevent tragedies from happening?

I know I have people around me who can support me. And they do. But when it comes to the business side of things it’s difficult to admit that things aren’t great.

“I don’t want them to know I’m not invincible.”

“I don’t want them to think less of me.”

“I don’t want to cross the line that divides my professional life with my personal life.”

These are the things I keep saying to my support system.

But how do you start that conversation? Do you just blurt it out? Do you lead up to the conversation? These are the questions I keep asking…

I don’t hide my diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety and Depression – it’s out there on the internet.

I run a mental health blog.

I’m not hiding it. But I’m not vocal about my struggles as they’re happening.

I want people to feel encouraged – so sharing that I’m struggling doesn’t happen often.

I don’t want to inconvenience people.

And it sucks.

It sucks because I would tell LITERALLY ANYONE not to worry about inconveniencing someone else if they’re not okay.

It sucks because it leaves me sitting at my desk, having a panic attack while people are still asking things of me.

It sucks because I feel alone.

And I know it doesn’t have to be this way.

 

Are you an entrepreneur or business owner who deals with more than just the “typical” stress and anxiety of the business?

This one’s for you…

You’re not alone. Let’s start the conversation.

 

Being an entrepreneur can be lonely. It can make you feel very isolated. Add a mental illness to the mix and it can lead to some very dark times. So, to all entrepreneurs and business owners…

Can we commit as business owners to check in on each other? Ask “how are you doing” and actually listen for the answer?

One thought on ““I’m not okay.” [Being a business owner shouldn’t change that.]

  1. Yes, let’s speak with each other and actually listen to what is being said. Looking into someone’s eyes and letting them know they are being heard is very important.

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